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Showing posts from December 11, 2016

Canine Confessions

To my owner,
I feel the need to get a few things off my chest. We've had a whole year together now and I want to take some time to review some of our most memorable moments. I am entitling this letter, “My Canine Confessions”.
It was me who ate the entire box of crayons. They just looked so delightfully beautiful. Thanks for renting that carpet-cleaning machine to clean up my mess after I got sick from the toxicity and almost died.
I also ate the whole pan of brownies (every tiny crumb) you made for those 8 ladies that came over to your house. I have heard through the doggy grapevine that chocolate is a big “no no” but apparently it’s fine for me!
About the whole Easter fiasco…yikes. I found the Easter candy hiding in the closet. I got through that first bag of chocolate eggs and really needed some jelly beans to finish the meal. I know you had to go out and get more Easter candy for Wes and his two cousins. It wasn’t that smart of you to put it in the exact same spot I found …